Written by Amanda DiBiaso

If you’ve been to music festivals/shows in the Midwest (and beyond) there is a good chance you’ve seen them…the little “Space Cheetah Approved” stickers, which have been spotted on people and things in a variety of places over the years, begging the question, who is this Space Cheetah? Well, I recently caught up with this ever elusive being and convinced him to give an exclusive interview to The Jamwich. Check out the Q&A below!

Who is Space Cheetah? 

Well I am, of course. Who else would be? There certainly aren’t any other Space Cheetahs on earth are there?

(Pauses, intensely looks at interviewer, waiting for an answer)

No? Ok I was thinking somehow we left someone behind.

Well, I mean I suppose I am “A” Space Cheetah, and as a representative of my species I just took our name as my own name. Lazy as f**k, right?

But for all intents and purposes of the people here in your world, I am The Space Cheetah.

We’ll just keep it easy.

Where is Space Cheetah from? 

I come from a what your scientists would refer to as a “trans-dimensional space” – a world between worlds, if that’s easier for you.

It’s like Narnia, but like with yarn, so we call it Yarnia. It’s like an in-between space.

My species diverged from the human evolutionary tree several thousands of years ago on Earth at a time when this world was both less populated and even more highly advanced.

Your current world echoes that world-gone-by in many ways. Scientific study about the nature of the universe and consciousness was an obsession throughout the world at that time. My fellow Space Cheetah eventually found a way to move between dimensions, and even to reside there – totally devoid of time. Yarnia was born.

But earth was young and uneasy.

After the great fall of man, we stayed away for a while, choosing to remain in Yarnia, but we then found it difficult to return to this world (your world) after some time. But the progressions of the universe rarely leaves doors closed, and recently – after the year 2012 – the door to this world was kicked back open.

And it was through that open door I strolled, back into this world. And so, here I am.

How long has Space Cheetah been around?

Long enough to know. (brushes dirt off shoulder)

If you’re asking how long I’ve been here on Earth in this world you know, well I’ve been here since about halfway through your solar year 2012.

What makes someone Space Cheetah approved?

It seems so obvious to me, I often forget that others do not see in the same way that I do.

To answer your question, certain people just glow.

I pay attention to how someone affects the world around them, but also their ability to be at-ease. People that are Space Cheetah Approved draw your attention, but not because they are needy for it. Approved individuals have an incredible self-awareness and confidence about who they are and are quite comfortable in their own skin.

The best summary is this: Space Cheetah Approved individuals must truly know themselves, and be comfortable with what they find there.

These people are vibrant, confident, engaging, not easily offended, and their whole face lights up when they smile.

I find that it is my job to point those people out, so that a positive example can be set for others to observe.

What makes something Space Cheetah approved?

A thing is only approved when its vibrance, utility, and interactive properties all radiate with intensity – but without being overwhelming.

I’ve always found that excess intensity can lead too easily to a state of discomfort, and that is ultimately exactly what I’m trying to combat against.

Be awesome and don’t suck, basically.

We don’t expect a perfect positive light devoid of faults or darkness to qualify, but we do hope for a positive balance. You know, it’s like having the right amount of “feng” in your “shui,” and you’d really be surprised the difference it makes.

I want to teach others help tip the scales to the positive end of the spectrum.

Because it’s better to be approved.

You don’t want to be not approved.

Anything in particular not Space Cheetah approved?

The entire state of Indiana in not approved. Most everything else is more time-and-place specific.

Also ketamine, ketamine is not approved.

So, a person can be an approved individual and do ketamine, but ketamine itself is not approved.

What does the Space Cheetah do for fun/in your spare time?

I like to practice String Theory, and Yarn Theory.

Funniest/most memorable Space Cheetah related moment?

A funny one was when I informed a young man this summer that he was approved, and even provided him with some stickers of his own so that he may approve others of his own volition!

I gave him the strip of stickers and told him sternly before walking away, “But remember. They are earned, not given.”

Then he froze and I watched as his pupils got smaller.

I turned walked away quickly. My work was done.

There was one that made it onto on the bush of a naked guy at an LCD Soundsystem cover band show sometime somewhere a couple years ago. Seemed totally normal at the time.

Occasionally I’ll discover an approved individual that is currently asleep, but still just emanating their need for approval. With the help of others around me at the time I’ve covered those people in as many stickers as humanly possible (see pic). People are happy to join in.

Where have Space Cheetah approved stickers been spotted?

I have many loyal constituents. They can be found across the world.

The people of this world are invited to submit their own photos of approval to www.spacecheetahapproved.com/show-me-your-stickers